Miki’s NVC Principle-Based-Teaching Calls

This is in celebration of Miki Kashtan’s Principle-Based-Coaching calls which she offers free each month for people sharing Nonviolent Communication.  Being in Hong Kong I can’t attend them live but it is possible to download previous calls and listen whenever. The thing I love about them is that anyone who is sharing Nonviolent Communication can call in (if they aren’t asleep that is) and Miki asks each person to suggest something for the calls itinerary, and then they vote for the topic which interests most people and try to link in most questions. At first, it seems a bit of a bore to listen to many unknown people introducing themselves, especially on a recorded call when you can skip it, but the magic runs the whole way through as you hear from people with the same questions and struggles, and I like to try to guess Miki’s answers.

Sometimes she gets to all the questions, sometimes not but I love to hear her answers which, as they are based on principles can be applied to so much.  I also get confidence from hearing the simplicity with which she holds the space – she doesn’t know who will call, how many people or what they will say but her confidence that she can handle what comes up, she can say, ‘this is not the right forum or I don’t think that you would benefit from this call’, to people who are not so familiar with NVC to prevent the discussion going too far from the purpose of the call, or ‘there is not enough time for this here, I can’t help you now’, as well as sharing her experience. I appreciate someone modelling the clarity to distinguish conversation for relevancy and examine her own capacity for what she is offering.

limestone crags rise out of the sea.
Halong Bay in shades of grey.

In a world of compulsively saying ‘yes’; pressure to ‘think on one’s feet’ and ‘have all the answers at your fingertips’, I love to see Miki pausing, then clearly stating what the knows from her intuition/experience to be the case and when she speaks I think what she says is very likely to be helpful, but if I don’t she would be the first to say I should go my own way.

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